In The Name Of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.
ok. force. i'm not gonna speak in terms of physics or whatnot. this is about, memaksa. paksaan. forcing to do something.
ok, force is good at times, it gives us a push to do something (good) that initially we don't want, and have benefits out of it.
i do admit, sometimes i need a good push (force) to do something because i'm too lazy, none of the words in the world can describe my laziness. but at other times, i just feel like, "it's too much".
bear in mind, i'm a human. i have my patience limits, i have conscience, i have a heart. ok, the point is, i'm a HUMAN.
i don't like it when people forcing me to do something i don't like (let it be good or bad) and when i insist on not doing it, they make me feel guilty for doing so. W H A T ?!
i easily feel guilt out of things, and after analysing my own behaviour, i usually feel guilty out of stupid things. (some might say it's not stupid)
so i usually ended up doing the things i don't like because i just want you to stop talking about it or i just want to end my guilt. are you satisfied? you've succeed making me doing things i don't want, without my own will.
on the note of doing good things :
"mula-mula rasa terpaksa, tapi dah lama-lama baru rasa ok dan akan suka sendiri".
true. i don't deny this. it has happened to me. it takes time, and i actually thank the person who gives me the push on this matter. certain things, dear, certain things.
i have friends who doesn't like to be forced to do things so i understand how they feel. i tend not to force anyone to do anything they don't like, even though that might be a wrong thing to do at that time. they should come to sense by themselves, by our help. not by forcing them or anything.
sigh.
i just think that there's other ways to make someone to do things, without forcing anyone (directly anyway) and makes them feel guilty.
i just don't like it when you did this to me. i didn't see that coming, i just didn't think you'd do such things. maybe you're just doing your part of the job.
fyi, it kills me when i get the texts. first i feel guilty, after a few texts i feel annoyed and when there's more texts i just feel fed up. it feels like you don't understand me. and this has sadden me. i don't hate you, i just hate what you've done. can't really blame you.
i have thought about it, maybe i did have a change of heart, and maybe i start to act differently now and this has worries you, but that was not the way to make me feel better. it might just scare me away, didn't you think of that?
yeah, thought so.
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