I was reading couple of books - Dale Carnigie's (how to stop worry and start living) and Muharikah's (hidup yang aku pilih) Haven't finish them, I jumped one book to another. I got to say, they are helping me a lot.
Few days back I had some breakdown (as always, almost every breakdown is written here) and along that week I read their books. Basically the gist of the books are, no matter where you are in life right now, something is going to go wrong or something that you're not gonna like will happened. The difference is either you going to worry too much or will do something about it.
Yes, I worry too much. Where am I going to live? I am broke and I am living in a debt. I don't have a stable job, and when I do get a stable job - can I survive that hell hole? I have no control in my financial state. I have to take care of myself but everything is so darn expensive out there. I'm so weak physically, mentally and emotionally.. How am I going to survive?
The thing is, I always feel my life is so pathetic and sad so there are days I spent weeping about it when the fact that I should be doing something to change it. Yes, I can't change the situation as a whole but I can change my mindset and be better about it. When I worry less, the clearer I see to handle the situation.
If I'm going to spend my days worrying about the unseen future, I will die of my own emotions and fear. So, I'm just going to live my days as it is, the best I can, take things at a time. Slow and steady. I should stop comparing my life with others as my life isn't like any other. I should stop taking things too seriously and just live life. I should be able to survive, insyaAllah by His Grace.
It is scary out there, and I feel like I got no one else with me. But it's okay. I know He will protect me and take cares of me; like He is doing now and every day.
insyaAllah.