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perhaps it's time.

In The Name Of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.


photo by Umar Mita



I know I'm not the right (or even righteous) person to guide you, but I'm trying to as it's part of my responsibility.

I know what are our purpose of life, and the dunya is just sinking us both and we gotta try to swim back to the shore!

If we love someone; we'll try to abstain them from getting into hell and we'll do anything, just anything to save them from hellfire. and because I love you so, I'm doing this. I tried, but He is the one, and only one who hold your heart.


"Indeed, you do not guide whom you like, but Allah guides whom He wills. And He is most knowing of the [rightly] guided." Al-Qasas 28:56


****

one night, in our hostel. everyone was sleeping. suddenly I woke up to the smell of the smoke. I looked around and saw the building is on fire. and I knew I have to save myself and get out of this building as soon as I can. as I got up from the bed, I saw my roommate, dead asleep, not aware of what was going on.
"Bangun, weh, hostel terbakaq ni!"
"hmmmmmm........" huh, she's not even awake. I tried one more time.
"Bangun! aku serious ni weh."
"Huh? mana ada terbakar. hang ni mamai apa ntah." and she went back to sleep. How frustrated I was. I tried to wake her up and it wasn't working at all. At all!

I was thinking to myself, should I just grab my things and leave? or... continue to wake her up?

****

perhaps it's time, to make a change. to change for the better.

regret, not.

In The Name Of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.


when we're in the midst of disobeying His orders, and doing what He told us not to when we are clear of the do's and don'ts, istighfar.

istighfar, dear heart.

gather up your strength and let it go.

and when you do let it go because of Allah, insyaAllah He'll make it ease for you.

for once, I didn't think of sudden changes will happened to me. I know one day it will happened, but I didn't think it would be this soon. too soon. too abrupt, I felt like I didn't have the chance to say goodbye.

I thought to myself, yes, this is the better path. no more rooms for making sins, insyaAllah. or at least, lessen the sins I've made.

but deep inside I couldn't help but to say, " why on earth did I let this go this? I felt a little of regret. "

and astaghfirullah, I shouldn't feel regret.

never regret leaving the things He hates and never ever regret of doing something good for your soul.

the path is never easy for those who were promised Heaven.

if getting into Jannah is as easy as A B C, we will all crammed into Jannah like those boneless sardine in a can. eh?

Jannah is not easy to achieved but it's not impossible. we have all the 'cheat codes' in the Quran.

to simplify : do as what He pleases, leave all the things He hates.

it's all there, masyaAllah. it's up to us to move our butt to work on it or just sit out on this one, and see other people striving for Jannah. and one day in Akhirah, we'll be looking at them with bright and happy faces, as they get to enter Jannah. and us? wallahu'alam.

whenever we wanna do something, ask ourselves, is this permissible in Islam?

Islam never restricts any thing way too much. it is us who exaggerate on a certain aspect of Islam. Islam love modesty. never too extreme and to 'chill' for anyone. never. most of the things that are permissible might fall into 'danger' zone when we do it excessively. and that, insyaAllah I will go on deeper on that matter in another post.

ya Allah, grant us strength and make us istiqamah with this wonderful deen.

when I tried to do something and every thing seems out of place, I felt this is His way of telling me off -- "Sya, have you forgotten about your Lord? Have you recited enough my love letters every day? Have you remembered me during your day and night? Have you..."

So remember Him and only in remembrance of Allah the heart finds peace. (13:28)


fitrah

In The Name Of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.

Allahu akbar, walillahilhamd.

How I missed the sound of takbir in the eve of Syawal, and the morning after. Eidul fitri, the day of celebration for us, after a month of struggling in the university of Ramadhan, we get to celebrate ourselves on this 1st day of Syawal. however, a question always stuck in my head every time Ramadhan ends, "Do I deserve to celebrate this day?" I have always felt that I didn't make the most of Ramadhan. and it makes me wonder will I get the chance to meet the next Ramadhan? :( what's worse? I didn't managed to achieved my only goal for Ramadhan, that is to finish all 30 juz of Quran (with the meanings of course!) I have failed. *cries* I will try again next time insyaAllah!

this year I celebrated eid in SP; and alhamdulillah, I get to track back my maternal relatives who I've never seemed to know. (or knew but forgotten since we didn't come back here often before this) I told ma to draw all the relatives in a family tree form ; since her cousin had 10 kids and all of them have kids and grandkids. =.="

had 2 of the sisters visited over, and my rabb, they're just so sweet. kak keenah and kak eda. what they've been always telling me that, being a HO is tough, and even tougher if you are without Him. if He is the only intention of yours to become a doctor, insyaAllah you will survived and will never give up.

not just this, but anything my dear friends, anything. if you do for the sake of Allah SWT, you will feel relief, you will not feel negative and so and so. example : love your family for the sake of Allah, no matter how disappointed we felt with them, we will still try to mend the relation and also try to keep in a good condition.

sure, we as human, it's part of our fitrah to feel sad, angry, and whatever emotions we can feel. that's why it's important to tajdid our intentions; to renew it every single time, so that we are aware and always in remembrance of Him.

so, let's tajdid our intentions!

husnu zhon

In The Name Of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.

husnu zhon means having good thoughts (about others)

in Islam, we are taught to have good thoughts on others, for we do not know what really happened. so we wouldn't be so judgmental about others. for example, when you see some young teenage girl got pregnant, and you will be thinking that, "oh, this girl must've been sleeping around!" but it may not be true! she might got raped. get it?

something like that.

or the saying that goes "don't judge a book by its cover" applies in the context of husnu zhon as well.

it's not easy, but we have to give it a try. the moment you have bad thoughts (su-u zhon) it will immediately effect your heart. you will think you are better than others (takabbur) and feels so good about it! (riak) nauuzubillah min zalik!

husnu zhon is good. it purifies the heart in a way and gives you the positivity of life. you wouldn't feel down or anything. seeing things in the brighter side is nice!


temporary excitement.


In The Name Of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.


it's nice to see myself updating the blog regularly. *grins* it's like seeing something rising up from the ashes I supposed? haha. bear with me, I blog when I feel there's things to share. ;P

as usual, I put myself together (oh, sounds very sadistic there) to go to the hospital for practicals. but each day there's always an outcome, a non-related medic study outcome from it.

today, I learnt that there's so many cases of underage sex, premarital sex (that end up in obs & gynae section, if you know what I mean*) and most of them comes from the malays. when kak keenah did her 'clerking' I saw the files and I was literally having goosebumps and in fear.

14, 15 year olds are smoking, sexually active? "drinking since 18 year old". a drug user as well. are. you. kidding. me?

the main reason is pretty much the same. lack of attention.love from the family. lack of religious act.  I guess all those are things that basically gives you pleasure in life. but it's temporary. it ENDS. when it ends, you crave for more and more and more, and when it's too late, you will most likely end up having liver cirrhosis, hepatitis C, lung cnacer and a child in your belly. and are too broken to be accepted in the family. maybe.

then it hits me; it's not their fault, they didn't know, they were the victims in this condition. if only they knew there is another way. to channel all the energies, to Islam itself. how wonderful Islam is, it's the perfect religion as it covers pretty much the WHOLE life cycle of a man. as Ustaz Alias Othman (a lecturer at CSCMU) said, even when you park your car, there is an Islamic way and by Islamic way, of course it is based on Quran and hadith. subhanallah!

how you may ask?

Abu Hurairra reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “A man passed by a fallen branch in the middle of the road and said, ‘By Allah, I will remove this from the path of the Muslims so that it does not inconvenience them’ and he was admitted into the Garden.” (Muslim)

by implying this hadtih on parking a car, one should park so that he will not create an obstacle (and make way) for other people. get it? awesome right?!

so. as the Ustaz said, even a tiny thing such as parking a car has an Islamic way, what about the bigger things? of course there is!

we must know and understand why we are told to abstain from taking alcohol, drugs, and premarital sex. and for these people who did all these, it's not their fault if they don't understand. someone should tell them. someone should explain to them. someone is us!

we, as the people who has the ilm (knowledge) of why is so and so, we should spread it. Rasulullah SAW once said, “Spread my Message, even if it is one word" and the message is not just limited to Rasulullah's hadith, but also to what the prophet intend to spread; which is Islam itself.

all of a sudden, I feel that it's truly my destiny to become a doctor, to treat the illness of the patient inside out, jasad and their roh.


honestly, I feel so blessed, as He had protect me from all these 'social illness'. I may be ignorant in the past, with most of my friends are male, I was living in the city, with all my likings of useless things, my idols were the celebrities, I was never sexually active, smoking and abusing drugs and insyaAllah will never be.

but somehow I can relate why the teens are acting so.

these things made you feel happy. but for a shortwhile. that's why we crave for more. and it's part of human's characteristic to satisfy one's nafs. it's just when you do it the wrong way, it's wrong.

so many life lessons to be learnt. :)

PS : didn't proof read. kak mazwin's laptop is just too unique. he he. juuuust kidding, kak. loves ya. ;)